A Letter to Derek Jeter

Dear Mr. Jeter
Can I call you Derek? Look, I know we have had our differences in the past: you are one of the greatest Yankees ever and I am the general manager that won the Boston Red Sox 2 championships in this decade. You may have noticed the animosity that manifests itself throughout our battles. Mayybbbee you remember the 2004 ALCS? All I am saying is that our rivalry is the greatest in sports, but do the players actually care about that? Take Johnny Damon. With the Sox for a couple of years, helped win the title, and then moved onto the Bronx for a better contract. Derek, when it comes to money, you don’t have many years left to collect. And what I hear from the rumors is that the Yankees may try and lowball you. Did you hear what our owner John Henry recently did? He bought a English Premiership team. We got money to spend, and we want to spend it on you. Sure, your fielding was mediocre this year,(congrats on the gold glove), but we see a spot for you on our roster. You may ask why? Why would the Boston Red Sox want to offer me more money than the only professional team I’ve ever played for? The answer? We don’t really care about money. I would plant a syringe in Big Papi’s locker just to see the look on the faces of die-hard Yankees fans as you trot out to shortstop in the top of the first inning in the Bronx. You seem to be the kind of guy who likes attention. May I remind you of who you’ve dated in the last 5 years? You’ll have to tell me the full list when you’re signing the 4 year-80 million-dollar contract we are going to offer you. What i’m saying is that there is no greater accomplishment than turning an entire fan base against you. Look at Lebron! But the most interesting thing about your situation D-bone, is that they wont boo you because you mean too much to them. You could write one of the greatest stories in sports history if you come to Beantown. Just think about it.
Your Friend,
Theo Epstein.
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